Confidence from God

Growing up I struggled with insecurity and VERY, VERY, VERY, VERY, (I cannot stress that enough) low confidence. My confidence was so negative, it was scary. Because of that I acted out in many ways that I wish I wouldn’t have. Thank God I didn’t make any permanent choices, but I was contemplating them. I still have days where my self-confidence gets a little shaken but it is NOTHING compared to the way I used to feel. The change is SOLEY because of God. The more I began to read my bible the truth finally dawned on me and I realized that I was believing a lie and the lie was that I was not beautiful or important.  I could see the damage that this lie had done in every area of my life and I asked God to help me repair it. Now, it took some time, and it was not an overnight change. The biggest key to this all was that I had to have renewal of my mind. I began to intentionally focus on bible verses that spoke about how God created us ALL individually for a purpose and with a great destiny over our lives. My favorite is Psalm 139:14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well (NIV). Another is Jeremiah 29:11  For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future (NIV).

Another thing God had me do to build my confidence is something I would like to share with you. Rather than focus on outer beauty he had me focus on my inner beauty which was really a strange feeling. He asked me “Meghan, what makes you attractive?” I was very uncomfortable with the question because I didn’t view myself as beautiful and certainly not attractive… so I sat there….. and he said “WRITE” and this came out.

What makes me attractive?
□ God- you being inside of me naturally draws people to me, because they want you
□ Prayer- I can pray for everyone and I know God will strengthen them
□ Kindness- People want to be around kind people because they know they will have a low chance of      being hurt or if they do get hurt the person will apologize.
□ Genuineness- being real and honest with people. I don’t have to have all the right words or answers to    give to people, but I don’t have to pretend or be fake. I am allowed to be honest and truthful without being mean or shady. I can trust that God will cover my truth or in some instances I can just say nothing at all and rest in the fact that I have God. He is ALWAYS the truth.
□ Happiness- I have God and that makes me happy, I know that I am NEVER alone. I know that I am always taken care of.


Even as I read it now, it blows my mind that this came out of me, and my pen. It is from God and it makes me feel good. On days when I’m not as kind, or as genuine or I don’t feel full to the brim with God, I can rest in the fact in this is how he sees me. I can remind myself of this. My confidence doesn’t lie in my looks, or anything of my own doing. Instead it is in every beautiful thing he has poured into me.

Sincerely,
Meghan

Your heart...

Proverbs 27:19 "As in water the face is reflected as a face, so a person's heart reflects the person"

Your heart is YOU. It leads everything, what does your heart say about you. Everyday I run into people who deceive, lie to and cheat each other. I just can't bring myself to do it. Is it because I'm self righteous and perfect? HECKKKK NO, but because I have been doing heart work for a few years now. I always want peoples' experience of me to be authentic and really reflect who I am. Yeah we all have times when our attitude is stinky or we are just having a rough go but guess what... Your heart is attached to your head, and your mouth so what flows out of you reflects your insides ALWAYS. Time for a clean out.

Lessons from Genesis- Reap what you sow

In the passage I read this morning, I realized that even though Jacob was the chosen one, the seed of deceit he sowed waited for him right along the way as he he journeyed through life. 

After he deceived his dad and received Esau's blessings, he also was deceived by Laban and got Leah at first instead of Rachael. As we walk through our journey in life, it's important as Christians to sow good seeds so that when it's time to reap as we journey through life, we would reap good fruits. 

Another interesting part of this story that ministered to me was the the fact that Leah who was not so loved by her husband was granted blessings and was highly favored by God. Sometimes, people may mistreat us or make us feel like we don't matter, but if we count our blessings in it, we would realize that God did not forget us and God loved us all the way. Lastly, when our blessings are delayed sometimes, we have to form the habit of thanking and praising God in that situation because he is saving the best for us. Even though Leah and every other maid had children before Rachael, when it was God's time and Rachael had a child, he was the greatest amongst all the children after all was said and done. So in all things...give thanks.

-Bible App Notes

Beauty truly is in the eye of the beholder and Leah's wonderful personality made her more attractive to me. Think of how she must have felt in hearing that this man wanted to come live with them and work for free for SEVEN FULL YEARS to marry her younger, "prettier" sister. I would have felt defeated, insecure, inferior and sad for sure. Her father decides to trick Jacob and switch the brides and even after Leah entered the marriage Jacob still really didn't like her and offered himself to work SEVEN MORE YEARS to get his true love.... her sister. She must have felt like crap, for real and probably forgotten by God. This is not true, we are never forgotten and God hears our cries. God blessed her with many children and she got the chance to be part of the line of the savior! She is the mother of the tribe of Judah.

We don't know what either of them looked like but chances are the possibly looked  similar because they were sisters but it was all a matter of Jacob's tastes. Like Solange and Beyonce', they are both beautiful but one may like the other more. I prefer the funkiness of Solange but some may like the fun elegance of Bey.Vanessa and Angela Simmons are a great example too. 

-- Be strong. Be kind. Be confident--

Meghan

What would you say to God?

-Paige Alex

If God came to you and asked you to do something, what excuse would you tell him?

 • “I’ve never done that before.”

 • “I’m too old (or too young).”

 • “I’m going to face opposition.” 

• “The forecast looks rainy.”

When God asks us to do something it’s never at a good time. Why? Because it’s HIS time, not ours. He sees the big picture. We only see our picture. God knows the forecasts for centuries to come. We only see the clouds today.

When God asked Noah to build an ark, he had plenty of excuses to say “no.”

 • “I’ve never built an ark before.” 

• “I’m 500 years old.”

 • “The people around me are evil.” 

• “How am I going to manage a floating zoo?” 

Despite the excuses, “Noah did everything God commanded him” (verse 22). If Noah hadn’t, he’d be sunk…and so would we. What’s your reason for saying “no” to God? Whatever it is, it won’t hold water for very long.

-- Be strong. Be kind. Be confident--

Meghan

Oprah's Super Soul Sunday- Marianne Williamson

So I was watching this episode of Oprah's Super Soul Sunday with Marianne Williamson (whom I have never heard of). I wasn't expecting much but the episode was actually quite good! So good I had to take notes... Notes that I will share with y’all. :)

Marianne wrote a book titled " A Return to Love - A review of the course in Miracles”.  I had to pick up a pen and continuously rewind because THIS LADY WAS SAYING SOMETHING Y'ALL! 

©      We are an idea in the mind of God and an idea doesn't leave its source- therefore we are an extension of him and we cannot be separated from him.

©      We are either walking in love or in fear

©      We are more afraid of our light than our darkness

©      Every life is a platform- you don’t need to make your own, it is yours already.

o    The spotlight is shining on you, it comes from within J

©      For every person there is a specialized and individual curriculum from GOD

o   Generic curriculum for all is to live in love and forgiveness.

©      “It” is always happening- right now- take your lesson in the now. There should be no “someday my path will start”. I don’t need a new job for it to start etc.  It’s already going!

©      You can have grievance or miracles- if you are thinking an attack thought towards someone then you are suffering and your miracle can be blocked. The universe is self-correcting. A miracle is a shift in love.

©      You want to change a person or a circumstance, pray for that person’s happiness every day for 30 days.

©      Your greatest power to change the world comes from changing your mind about the circumstance.

©      All minds are joined, there is really no place where you start and I end….If I pray for you either you will behave differently or I will stop caring.

©      The Universe is self-organizing, and self-correcting. If you or others do wrong, the universe is already on it.

o   Divine compensation- the universe makes sure you get your return but if your heart is closed then you won’t be able to receive the miraculous new possibility that the universe is bringing.

©      Your life is already programmed into the mind of God.  All of the fabulous things that could happen is already mapped out and programmed into the mind of God, the blue print is already there. It’s like a file in the computer that you need to download. I have to download it; it is my choice to do so. I have to download the possibilities “On earth as it is in Heaven”. It’s an undeletable file but if I don’t ask and bring it down to the screen if I stay in bitterness then all I get is bitterness. That doesn’t mean it’s not in the computer it just means I need to go get it and ask for it. Yessssssssssss Lord! This is the truth!

©      There is no such thing as a grey day, no the sky is always blue, sometimes grey clouds seem to cover it but the sky is always blue. THE SUN/SON IS ALWAYS SHINING. “Blessed are those who have faith but do not see” The great stuff is always there sometimes you just cannot see it!

©      Happiness is a choice and should not be based on circumstances. If I am not happy there is something wrong, I am believing an illusion. I am seeing the evidence of fear and thinking they are real. ONLY GOD’S LOVE IS REAL!

o   à Dear God, I am willing to see this differently, because I am clearly looking through human eyes and it is showing me one reality and that is my perception, and my experience from that is I am feeling unhappy. Allow me to see this differently Lord, AMEN…. CHOOSE TO SEE GOD

©      Pray that you let all of your thoughts of blame and judgment go.

©      Blast people with love before you encounter them.

©      Spend at least 5 minutes in the morning with the HOLY spirit

©      Life has presented us all with the perfect lessons to strengthen your muscles

©      It is not up to you what you learn but it is up to you how you learn it

-Selah-

-- Be strong. Be kind. Be confident--

Meghan

                                                       

The books of the BIBLE

Consider the themes of the sixty-six books:

In Genesis, He is the Creator God.
In Exodus, He is the Redeemer.
In Leviticus, He is your sanctification.
In Numbers, He is your guide.
In Deuteronomy, He is your teacher.
In Joshua, He is the mighty conqueror.
In Judges, He gives victory over enemies.
In Ruth, He is your kinsman, your lover, your redeemer.
In I Samuel, he is the root of Jesse;
In 2 Samuel, He is the Son of David.
In 1 Kings and 2 Kings, He is King of Kings and Lord of Lords
In 1st and 2nd Chronicles, He is your intercessor and High Priest.
In Ezra, He is your temple, your house of worship.
In Nehemiah, He is your mighty wall, protecting you from your enemies.
In Esther, He stands in the gap to deliver you from your enemies.
In Job, He is the arbitrator who not only understands your struggles, but has the power to do something about them.
In Psalms, He is your song-and your reason to sing.
In Proverbs, He is your wisdom, helping you make sense of life and live it successfully.
In Ecclesiastes, He is your purpose, delivering you from vanity.
In the Song of Solomon, He is your lover, your Rose of Sharon.
In Isaiah, He is the mighty counselor, the prince of peace, the everlasting father, and more. In Jeremiah, He is your balm of Gilead, the soothing salve for your sin-sick soul.
In Lamentations, He is the ever-faithful one upon whom you can depend.
In Ezekiel, He is your wheel in the middle of a wheel-the one who assures that dry, dead bones will come alive again.
In Daniel, He is the ancient of days, the everlasting God who never runs out of time.
In Hosea, He is your faithful lover, always beckoning you to come back-even when you have abandoned Him.
In Joel, He is your refuge, keeping you safe in times of trouble.
In Amos, He is the husbandman, the one you can depend on to stay by your side.
In Obadiah, He is Lord of the Kingdom.
In Jonah, He is your salvation, bringing you back within His will.
In Micah, He is judge of the nation.
In Nahum, He is the jealous God.
In Habakkuk, He is the Holy One.
In Zephaniah, He is the witness.
In Haggai, He overthrows the enemies
In Zechariah, He is Lord of Hosts.
In Malachi, He is the messenger God.

In Matthew, He is king of the Jews.
In Mark, He is the servant.
In Luke, He is the Son of Man, feeling what you feel.
In John, He is the Son of God.
In Acts, He is Saviour of the world.
In Romans, He is the righteousness of God.
In I Corinthians, He is the rock that followed Israel.
In II Corinthians, He is the triumphant one, giving victory.
In Galatians, He is your liberty; He sets you free.
In Ephesians, He is head of the Church.
In Philippians, He is your joy.
In Colossians, He is your completeness.
In I Thessalonians, He is your hope.
In II Thessalonians, He is your patience and discipline.
In I Timothy, He is your faith.
In II Timothy, He is your stability.
In Titus, He is the truth.
In Philemon, He is your benefactor.
In Hebrews, He is your perfection.
In James, He is the power behind your faith.
In I Peter, He is your example.
In II Peter, He is your purity.
In I John, He is your life.
In II John, He is your pattern.
In III John, He is your motivation.
In Jude, He is the foundation of your faith.
In the Revelation, He is your coming King.

What 2013 has in store for me :)

      2013 is 100% dedicated to my relationship with the MOST HIGH. I am not worried about boyfriends, making situations un-awkward for others, compromising my personal values or anything else that takes away from Me and God being together. It's gonna be fun!

      With that being said, I'm not a huge resolution person but I am a believer in plans. Here is the plan I have for making the most out of the next 365 days in 2013 with the Lord.

1.  Spend at least 30 minutes daily in the word, reading, meditating and reflecting.
2. Journalpray daily (This is something I like to do, I just write my prayers out at least one time a day, though I try to pray  mentally and verbally as much as possible throughout the day.

1. Yearly focus is WHO ARE YOU?- The focus of 2013 is who are you and who do you want to be? Who does God say I am? What can I offer to this world? In what ways can I be the best version of myself in Christ Jesus?
1. 1 Have a monthly focus of a characteristic that I would like to build up/cultivate within myself. This focus should infiltrate everything I do.  

                   a. January - FAITHFULNESS- in all things asked of me. 
                   b. February- Loving others/Humility
                   c. March- Loving Self/ Personal Empowerment
                   d. April- Quietness/Meekness (BIRTHDAY MONTH :))
                   e. May- Listening
                   f. June- Kindness
                   g. July- Faithfulness (a second time this year to get a re-up halfway
                        through the year)
                   h. August- Humility
                   i. September- Wisdom
                   j. October- Discretion
                   k. November- Observation
                   l. December- Working in my gifting (Writing)

These are tentative and of course can change but these are the top qualities I want to work on! Already working on the faithfulness.

I want to be in love.... with God, with self and with all others.

-- Be strong. Be kind. Be confident--

Meghan

p.s.
Other Goals:
Read a book a month (non school related) This is gonna be tough but I can do it)
Lose another 30 lbs this year :)

31 Days of Prayer for your husband or future husband

31 Days of Prayer for Your Future Husband


1.To become a holy man, mature and growing in the Lord.
2. For contentment.
3.To take every thought captive, and not be conformed to the world’s thinking and to think scripturally.
4.To seek God with all his heart and grow in dependance on Him.
5.That he would be ever captivated by my love
6.To be a man of courage and boldness.
7. For wisdom to lead his family physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.
8. To look at the plank in his own eye before seeing other’s sawdust.
9. To be a called man, not driven, with well thought-through and prayed-through goals in life
10.To be a man of prayer, guarding his heart and mind, putting into practice what he has heard, seen and learned.
11.To stand firm against the wiles of the devil and resist Satan in all circumstances.
12. To strive after the Christian ideal, and partake of the deeper truths of the gospel.
13.Not to depend on his circumstances for happiness but on God alone.
14.That he would enter victoriously into spiritual warfare.
15.To have God’s strength in the midst of his busy schedule.
16.To have a burden to see lost people saved.
17. To be kept from strange women.
18. To have godly companions.
19. That his self image might be a reflection of the Lord’s thoughts toward him.
20. That he might not be deceived into unbelief, sin or bitterness.
21. To learn to love as God commanded.
22. That the fruit of the Spirit might be exhibited more and more in his life.
23. To grow in humility.
24. To grow daily in Godly character.
25. To keep a clear conscience.
26. The Lord might protect him.
27. To learn to manage his time well.
28. The Lord would put a song in his heart.
29. To have a holy fear of God.
30. To have a desire to minister to others.
31. That I would be the best helpmate and encourager for him.

P.S. I read this book and it was FANTASTIC! These prayers didn't come from here but it is still a good resource :)

Solomon's Temple

1st Kings 8 and so on...

So I am currently on the Chronological Bible reading plan which is AWESOME! I did it last year and it was the first time I REALLY read the bible from cover-to-cover. I like it because it enables you to read the Bible in order of how things actually happened and it gives you a little more historical insight and understanding. Now that I'm doing it a second time I have even MORE insight because of additional bible studies and books and sermons so it really is awesome because every time I read a passage I know a little more and I get something different but anyways...

I used to think the Bible was extra boring especially the long parts about "So and so begot so and so" and Solomon's Temple... I was like "Why I gotta know how much gold he used and how he decorated the walls????" . Around this time last year when I was reading it I really just sped through it so I could say I read it... but TODAY, ohhhh today, I asked God to stir up some revelation for me and make this word speak to me.

For those who don't know the story I will give it to you in short. King David (yes same David from David in Goliath) grows up and has a son named Solomon. Now David was supposed to build a temple for the Lord but in the end he doesn't get to do it and the task is passed down to his son Solomon. Solomon grows up to be the wise king and he begins building this intricate, extravagant and beautiful temple for the Lord. It took him 7 years, help from others (craftsmen, artists, laborers etc), and alot alot alot of fine materials (cedar, gold, bronze etc.) He took his time to oversee, pray on it and make sure it was done right.

God spoke to me in this story today, and he pretty much told me I NEED TO BUILD A TEMPLE in my heart for the Lord like Solomon. I need to make this special place for us. Lately I have not been honoring our relationship properly. This is right on time because my pastor gave a great bible study on Thursday about Relationship and it bothered me (in a good way). Solomon did it right, he did it just the way God asked him to do it, he did it with honor, he used the finest materials, he enlisted the proper help, he prayed over it and even though he couldn't do it overnight he still worked at it daily, for seven whole years. He made SURE it was done and he didn't take any short cuts in work or finances because he knew the value of the temple, and why he was executing/performing this task. Excellent food for thought.

Like I said, I used to just skip and skim over these chapters in my BIBLE but EVERYTHING in the word applies to you if you let it and ask the Lord to HELP you. Today I read with intention, sat with it and changed my attitude to be open to hearing from God about what I was reading. We get so "busy" with life that we don't build upon our personal relationship with God. This is not just about going to church every once and awhile, your relationship is yours, its PERSONAL. Only you can praise God for you, he wants to know you and hear from you.

I CAN BUILD A TEMPLE. Yesssss its gonna take time, but its gonna be beautiful and worth it.

I can take my blueprint from good ole Solomon. I'm getting the best materials (gold, bronze,cedar/ time, discipline, effort), resources (craftsmen, artists, laborers = pastors, friends,mature Christians & books ) (y'all know I love a good book ;) ) and the BEST GOD!

As I keep plugging away and pushing this relationship with God :)

Dear Future Husband

This is not my writing but it is a find on Madame Noire :)

It is refreshing to see that someone else writes to their future husband as well :)

great great great!!!

Dear Husband of My Future,

      Although I have yet to lay eyes on you, I have faith that you are worth the wait. Contrary to what I used to believe, you will not complete me, but you will compliment the whole person that I already I am. With that said, I have been and will continue to take advantage of my time of singleness because I realize that singleness is not the plague, but a time for me to work on myself and evolve into the woman that I was destined to be. This is why I will not waste this great season of my life sulking and complaining about not having a man. I was taught that patience is a virtue and great things come to those who wait. So instead of doing all that, I am using this time to attain multiple degrees, pursue the career of my dreams, travel the world, learn more about myself as a person and even learn what it means to be a wife as opposed to a girlfriend.

     It is in this time of singleness, I have chosen to refrain from certain activities in which most single young adults in my age group engage in, such as sex. On August 8, 2010, which was my 20th birthday, I made a public vow in front of my entire congregation that I would refrain from sexual activity until the day that you and I exchange our vows in front of our loving family and friends, sealing our promises with an “I do.” Most would see this decision as absurd and unrealistic, but I believe that with God all things are possible. I wish to fully commit myself to you as well as our marriage well before we even cross paths. Although I am in no way perfect, experiencing things the way that God truly intended for them to be done is extremely important to me. I realize that sex is not merely for pleasure but it is a responsibility and a bond that should be shared between a husband and wife. I have also been a witness of the detriment that sex before marriage can bring and I wish to give our marriage a fair chance. Sexual intercourse can spiritually and emotionally tie you to a person and I wish to walk with as little baggage as humanly possible in your direction. No disrespect to anyone else and their choices.

      With baggage in mind I have also made the conscious decision to refrain from recreational dating because along with physical purity, I wish to enter our covenant of marriage emotionally and mentally pure as well. I will not date guy after guy just because, acquiring broken heart after broken heart just to appease my boredom or to satisfy my temporary loneliness. I don’t wish to come to you with a shattered heart covered in scars and bruises seeking for you to put the pieces back together. I refuse to enter our relationship not trusting you because of something some other guy did or did not do in the past that I could’ve completely avoided had I just waited for you. I will not jump at the first guy who smiles at me. I have been a witness to church hook-ups gone wrong that have even evolved into church marriages gone wrong and have made the decision not to partake in all that. I’ve been the church girl devastated to find out that the church boy she had been dating had been dating every church girl in and within a 25-block radius of said church. That is why I will stay single instead of calling Tyrone as one Madame Noire writer stated. Engaging in frivolous relationships to merely cure singleness as if it some devastating disease is pointless and not worth the trouble that it brings. I will guard my heart as Proverbs 4:23 instructs me to and I will follow the instructions of Song of Solomon by “not awakening love until its time” and setting my affections on no one other than you. Whoever you are.

      I’ve been called a dreamer for believing that a man like you exists. I’ve been called unrealistic and impossible. I’ve even been told that I believe that I am living out a Tyler Perry movie, but despite the naysayers, something deep down in the pit of my stomach tells me otherwise. I don’t believe that I am unrealistic for not settling for any old Johnny or Tyrone for that matter. I don’t believe you to be perfect, no one walking this earth is; however, I do believe that we will perfectly balance out one another. Call it picky, but I only wish to be with the one that God designed specifically for me instead of the man who alters himself to fit the mold of what he believes that I want. We may not cross paths for another five years, five months or five weeks, but once again, I have been convinced that patience is a virtue and I am willing to wait.

See you soon,

Jazmine

Youversion is the bomb...

As some of y'all know I am using Youversion.com to do my bible reading for the year.

When I was younger, in church, we were assigned to read the ENTIRE Bible in three years and I thought this was way too hard. I was so nervous yall, but eventually I did it (I think?) But I did not absorb ANYTHING AT ALL. Now I'M glad I'm grown and really re-reading because the Bible is fun. Right now IM LOVINGGG the story of David and his son Solomon.

Honestly think about it... David came from a normal farming and herding family and he was the baby. Literally like 8 years old when he defeated Goliath, a 9 foot MAN!
I keep asking God to show me his plan for my life and he keeps telling me to wait. (I'm working on my patience y'all) BUT I have to imagine what if I was David... If God would have told me that I was gonna fight a giant and win, become KING, have the WISEST and most rich son for a KING; I would not have believed it or I would have probably found a way to screw it up.

But thats the point, things come in due time, specifically Gods time. He doesn't have to reveal it all to you because he has it under control. Who am I to think I deserve to know now? I need to sit back and enjoy the ride and keep pursuing GOD! David didn't lose the faith even when his situation looked dire. (Saul's MULTIPLE attempts to kill him) He even was kind to his enemies. I want to be like David. That is all, hope this helps someone as it helped me :)