This is not my writing but it is a find on Madame Noire :)
It is refreshing to see that someone else writes
to their future husband as well :)
great great great!!!
Dear Husband of My Future,
Although I have yet to lay eyes on you, I have faith that
you are worth the wait. Contrary to what I used to believe, you will not
complete me, but you will compliment the whole person that I already I am. With
that said, I have been and will continue to take advantage of my time of
singleness because I realize that singleness is not the plague, but a time for
me to work on myself and evolve into the woman that I was destined to be. This
is why I will not waste this great season of my life sulking and complaining
about not having a man. I was taught that patience is a virtue and great things
come to those who wait. So instead of doing all that, I am using this time to
attain multiple degrees, pursue the career of my dreams, travel the world,
learn more about myself as a person and even learn what it means to be a wife
as opposed to a girlfriend.
It is in this time of singleness, I have chosen to refrain
from certain activities in which most single young adults in my age group
engage in, such as sex. On August 8, 2010, which was my 20th birthday, I made a
public vow in front of my entire congregation that I would refrain from sexual
activity until the day that you and I exchange our vows in front of our loving
family and friends, sealing our promises with an “I do.” Most would see this
decision as absurd and unrealistic, but I believe that with God all things are
possible. I wish to fully commit myself to you as well as our marriage well
before we even cross paths. Although I am in no way perfect, experiencing things
the way that God truly intended for them to be done is extremely important to
me. I realize that sex is not merely for pleasure but it is a responsibility
and a bond that should be shared between a husband and wife. I have also been a
witness of the detriment that sex before marriage can bring and I wish to give
our marriage a fair chance. Sexual intercourse can spiritually and emotionally
tie you to a person and I wish to walk with as little baggage as humanly
possible in your direction. No disrespect to anyone else and their choices.
With baggage in mind I have also made the conscious decision
to refrain from recreational dating because along with physical purity, I wish
to enter our covenant of marriage emotionally and mentally pure as well. I will
not date guy after guy just because, acquiring broken heart after broken heart
just to appease my boredom or to satisfy my temporary loneliness. I don’t wish
to come to you with a shattered heart covered in scars and bruises seeking for
you to put the pieces back together. I refuse to enter our relationship not
trusting you because of something some other guy did or did not do in the past
that I could’ve completely avoided had I just waited for you. I will not jump
at the first guy who smiles at me. I have been a witness to church hook-ups
gone wrong that have even evolved into church marriages gone wrong and have
made the decision not to partake in all that. I’ve been the church girl
devastated to find out that the church boy she had been dating had been dating
every church girl in and within a 25-block radius of said church. That is why I
will stay single instead of calling Tyrone
as one Madame Noire writer stated. Engaging in frivolous
relationships to merely cure singleness as if it some devastating disease is
pointless and not worth the trouble that it brings. I will guard my heart as
Proverbs 4:23 instructs me to and I will follow the instructions of Song of
Solomon by “not awakening love until its time” and setting my affections on no
one other than you. Whoever you are.
I’ve been called a dreamer for believing that a man like you
exists. I’ve been called unrealistic and impossible. I’ve even been told that I
believe that I am living out a Tyler Perry movie, but despite the naysayers,
something deep down in the pit of my stomach tells me otherwise. I don’t
believe that I am unrealistic for not settling for any old Johnny or Tyrone for
that matter. I don’t believe you to be perfect, no one walking this earth is;
however, I do believe that we will perfectly balance out one another. Call it
picky, but I only wish to be with the one that God designed specifically for me
instead of the man who alters himself to fit the mold of what he believes that
I want. We may not cross paths for another five years, five months or five
weeks, but once again, I have been convinced that patience is a virtue and I am
willing to wait.
See you soon,
Jazmine
